My Birth Story
By Heather in 
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we were just pregnant for 3 months, had no morning sickness and absolute no pain during labour? That is how my birth story unfolded when we adopted a beautiful baby boy last October.
After 2 years of struggling to fall pregnant (and all the infertility testing required) and an early miscarriage, my husband and I decided to start the adoption process. It was something we had always planned on doing so it wasn’t too big a thing to get our head around; we just imagined we would be able to have biological children first.
We went to see a private adoption agency at the end of May last year to see what it all entailed. It was quite an emotional day as we were so excited to be on the road to growing our family. The social workers explained all that we had to do, and after lots of forms, interviews and psychological screening tests we were finally “pregnant”!
Now the wait began. We were told to expect to wait between 9 months to a year-that was fine, it would give us plenty of time to get stuff ready. Then we had a phone call that we would possibly get a baby the beginning of December. Sooner than we had thought but still time to get everything ready.
Then we got THE phone call-only it was much sooner than expected and a little confusing. The secretary from the adoption agency phoned to say that my maternity leave forms were being e-mailed to me. I assumed that this was a general letter to all parents planning to adopt asking for leave. When opening my inbox I discovered that our son had been born in September and that he would be placed with us the following week. Completely confused (but very excited) we tried to get hold of our social worker but could not get through to her. After what felt like the longest hour of our life she called us back to apologise that she had not phoned us first to tell us the good news before the secretary had e-mailed the forms.
We were a little dazed the week before his arrival, not only were we about to become parents, my sister was getting married on the Saturday before! After a lovely wedding and not much sleep, family came round to help us get things ready, show us how to use a bottle, put on a nappy and anything else they thought might be helpful.
On Wednesday, 8 October at about 2 o’ clock we were on our way to a pregnancy crisis home to fetch our baby boy. I’d been crying all day. We were fortunate enough to meet his birth mother and some of her family (which many people thought wouldn’t be a good idea, but I’m glad we did it as I think it gave us all closure).She had chosen us to be his parents from a portfolio we had sent in. We sat in the lounge talking to her and we both had opportunities to ask each other questions.
I could hear a baby crying in another room. That was our son’s cry and it was just too overwhelming to comprehend. She then went to fetch him, said goodbye and handed him to us. He was the most beautiful baby in the world; he had all his fingers and so much hair. Just beautiful. Only two weeks old. Our family was now three which felt much better than two. And then he hiccupped, sneezed and vomited all over me and I suddenly realised my life would never be the same again-but in a good way!
Wow Heather, that is so special and really takes the term “meant to be” to a new level. I think it’s so special that you met his mom and it must have been so settling for her to see him going to a family who will love him and care so well for him. I had a little chuckle at the last line of the story! what a combo to say “here I am” your boy gave you!! no amount of time can prepare you for a baby but in your case that must have felt like a whirlwind!
Thank goodness for a good support structure to get you through those tricky first weeks.
Heather, what an amazing story!! He couldn’t have wished for a better start to life, in a home fulled with love! and in the end, I think whether you have 9 months or 2 weeks notice, you will always feel like you’re underprepared!!